I can relate to this story so much. Back in the mid to late 90s, I dated a Gujarati woman, and this was EXACTLY the situation I was in. Our relationship was delineated by two clear periods. For the first few years, it was torn by my growing impatience for her to tell her parents about me. It was fine during the first year. I understood how parents could be. As we went through the second year of dating, I grew more impatient. I wanted to be with a woman who could stand up to her parents and not let racial prejudice interfere. I was younger and less wise than I am now. I don’t think I fully grasped the profound impact of her culture and family on her. I might have still broken up, but I think I would have been less judgmental of her than I was at the time. It was easy for me to be sanctimonious in my racial pride as a young 20-something, not being in her shoes. So, I finally broke with her.
We spent about a year apart then got back together. She had finally told her parents and they loved me. They thought I was a great guy. (I knew they would) However, now the issue was my Christianity. During that year apart, I got really into my Christian faith and didn’t want to be “unequally yoked.” Long story short, we broke up again a few years later because I didn’t want to continue what’s called “missionary dating” (dating someone who’s not a Christian with the hope they’ll convert). Ironically, she was in the process of checking out Christianity and eventually did become one. Yet for whatever reasons, we felt it was best not to get back together after she did.
My thoughts about religion and relationships have changed A LOT. Over the past 20 years. During that time I’ve been married (17 years) and recently amicably divorced (to a different woman). Religion played both a good and a bad role in my marriage.
I hope you and your beau work out the religious differences. Hopefully, he’s the kind of Christian that can respect your different belief system and won’t try to “save” you. Whatever you decide, I’m sure you’re taking it seriously.
Thank you for sharing your story. I look forward to reading how it turns out (or seeing it in the next “Netflix Original” 😂)